almost 2 a.m.

shawne and adrian and i went for dinner after the bod at the new lebanese/kebab place where haagen daz used to be (where 'selection of six starters' apparently means that the waiter selects six at seeming randomness for you') and then shawne and i went to new college garden and sat on a bench and looked at the stars -- and it was a clear night and i think we saw the big dipper and loads of other stars except can't tell which is which -- and we just hung out for a bit and it was really good and helped me get a perspective on things. so i get a 2:2. fuck it lah. i've been doing work -- it's not enough and it's not very good but i have been working and i have been trying and if i get a 2:2 there wasn't much else i could have done, short of stay in the library every day since 2nd year...i'm fairly good at this. not very good, and it kinda depends which paper, but reasonably good. the exams are not a measure of my worth. i'm going to write it down here so i remember. and i've learnt a lot from oxford and i'm so glad i came here just because and whatever else, i'm going to keep that. and of course i'll probably be really crushed when the results come out and i get a 2:2 but like shawne says maybe it's just god/the universe :) trying to tell you something. this sounds like a bad self-help book or a bad beatles rip-off but -- let it go already. exams don't count for very much in the grand scheme of things -- the grand scheme of happiness and love and life, that is. as opposed to psc-world. :) -- earlier, standing outside blackwell's art shop, we saw two guys in black tie and a bottle of wine skip down the pavement singing 'we're going to see the wizard' -- and then later there were stars on a clear night over new college garden, and a friend to talk too -- that's oxford, just like that.